top of page

King of the Chonks: Round 1 - Former Players

It is known that among the CubsDNA staff, my strength is in the fluff pieces and games. If you read our DNA Glossary, you'll see that Chonks is an affectionate term for the bigger guys of baseball. They can't all have the bodies of Javy, J-Hey or Sparkles, but they're all still very athletic! So, in appreciation of the bigger guys of baseball, I present to you the King of the Chonks bracket!



Former Players:

Bartolo Colon vs. Jonathan Braxton.


Bartolo hit a home run as a Met! He makes athletic plays! But I think beating Dee Gordon to the bag is probably his best move ever. Even Dee couldn't believe it!


Do you remember Jonathan Broxton? Well, me neither, but I do remember this game. A forgettable NLDS series for the Cubs in 2008.


Prince Fielder vs. Rick Reuschel


There are tons of Prince Fielder videos out there of him running the bases (and flopping) and he solidified his sexiness by posing for the ESPN Body issue in 2014. And because it's only fair to post 1 pic or video per athlete, instead of the nekkid, I chose this hilarious gif - his sense of humor about his size is quite evident here in a walk-off celebration!


Rick Reuschel


Rick Reuschel was one of my favorite Cubs to watch when I was growing up. He was a work horse, averaging about 36 games pitched in the 1st 9 seasons with the Cubs. His nickname was "Big Daddy" because of his physique, although he compares now to Anthony Rizzo (Fat Uncle Tony!) in height & weight. He was a pretty good hitter and a sneaky fast runner for his size (see video starting at 8:25. This video also makes me miss Jack Brickhouse!).


John Kruk vs. Antonio Alfonseca


Fat guys who were pretty good hitters? That was John Kruk as a Phillie. Dude had a great sense of humor about himself while sporting a tremendous mullet.


Antonio Alfonseca, known for having an extra digit on his hands and feet, was the saves leader in 2000 and played for the Cubs in 2002-2003. In his tenure, his worst move was when he used his large frame to knock an umpire about 12 feet arguing a close (also bad) call against the Cubs (approx. 2:00 into the video). He ended up being suspended for 7 games for that bump.



Rich Garces vs. Bobby Jenks


Rich "El Guapo" Garcés was an elite set-up man for the Boston Red Sox in the late 90's and was a fan favorite with Sox fans, probably as much for his size as his performance and ever-sunny attitude.


Bobby Jenks played his best years as a White Sox and, as a rookie in 2005, closed out the final pitch for the World Series win. He was a two -time All Star who once held the record for retiring consecutive batters (41).


Jenks Pic courtesy of the AP



OK folks, who are your round 1 choices? Did I miss anyone? Share your links to your favorite big boy moments!




31 views

Recent Posts

See All
bottom of page